We are the children...

I spoke to a beautiful couple at a recent wedding and what they said to me just hit me on the head now. "When we have kids, we often become the children and learn from them." Maybe not those exact  words. They worded it better.

Adoree is growing and becoming her own person. She definitely has her own way of doing things. Her thoughts are spoken loud and firm. She will tell you want she wants or doesn't want. And she has begun to talk back. One minute she is the sweetest little girl and the next she's flipping out about the smallest things and telling me "no". Or using my own words against me. She is such a good big sister, never acting jealous or mean to Eyslee. She's soo caring and gentle with her and such a big helper. But she definitely has started to voice her opinions, make excuses, and reasoning. I know that they eventually reach this stage but I didn't realize so soon.

From trying to teach her what's right and wrong, I've learned that maybe I'm the one that's been approaching her backlashes the wrong way. If anything it might be making her want to rebel even more?

Is it just her personality? Maybe I need to talk to her differently. Will she grow out of this stage? --- All these questions. I feel like I need a class on how to teach my child to be good. Or how to be a good mom?

Because...maybe I'M the bad one? She is so so smart, she remembers everything. Will she hold grudges? She still hugs me and says she loves me so she must not?

I've been googling and googling on children behaviors, toddler tantrums, how to discipline. How do I teach her the right ways and not change who she is. 

No matter what, I just need to let her know I love her. Let her know that I'm trying to guide her. 

For the first time these past couple months, I have realized how hard it is to be a mom. Sure...running around making sure she's fed, bathed, happy can take up a lot of time but it's the how to guide a child that's the hard part. 

Everyday is a learning day...for all of us. 

This made me remember the day when my own mom yelled at me because I kept making the same mistake cashing out some change from the cash register back when we ran a restaurant, and I was so sad and had tears streaming down my face, but what made me even more sad was that after my mom yelled at me, she went and sat and cried to herself. 

Now I see myself in her shoes (big hugs for my mom!!!)...a few times when I've yelled at adoree for doing something naughty, I couldn't help the tears that formed in my eyes as she looks at me with sadness and tears running down her face. (Could be due to the raging hormones trying to balance itself after birthing Eyslee... ) Now I see my moms struggles as they begin to be mine. 

Anyways, I keep reading that you have to pick your battles. And try to not fret the small ones. 

One day she will understand I'm just trying to prepare her for the real world right? And she'll know that we discipline because we care?

*takes in a deep breath* 

I'm sure this is nothing compared to what's to come when she becomes a teen @_@!

Just some thoughts for the day...everyday ^_^

I love them.

And I love my mom & dad for everything they've done or not done.

I need to pee...wait...my water broke!

Eyslee Tong Cao, born 12:57pm- July 31st, 2014. 7lbs 14 oz,

20.25 inches long. 

Better blog before my brain deteriorates anymore than it has already. Been forgetting things left and right! I still had my pregnancy brain from having Adoree, and having Eyslee only added to my already forgetful brain! 

Here's me posting my baby bump. My calendar tells me Eyslee will be due soon! Lol, like I needed a reminder.

So here's my birthing story with baby Eyslee. If you don't like reading about labory stuff, and about bodily fluids then I suggest you stop reading here :) 

I've been having close contractions since Tuesday, July 29th, two days before due date. I had timed them and followed the 511 where the contractions come within 5 minutes at where each contractions lasts for at least a minute and coming consistently for one hour. We had Adoree the last time my contractions were timed. So surely Tc thought I was going to go into labor that night or soon. But I didn't think the contractions were that strong. Nonetheless, I went and showered just in case and we all slept on the fold out couch that night so if we needed to head out it'd be convenient. Well nothing happened and we headed downstairs to bed. The same thing happened Wednesday night and I ignored the contractions and went to bed again. 

Thursday morning comes along and I wake up at 6am needing to pee. I sat up with my big belly and moaned "I need to pee", then felt a gush of water. "uh o, I'm leaking! I think my water broke!" More gushing followed. I had Tc pull me out of bed quickly and hand me towel after towel. I was so nervous and even shaking from being so nervous! More so than I was when I went into labor with adoree! My water never broke with adoree and the doctor broke it when I was in mid labor to progress more quickly so I was just really surprised with my water breaking this time. 

We had everything packed so just had to throw in the last toiletries and get adoree ready. Yes, she came with us. At this point I did have contractions but they weren't coming very frequently or intense. Just the amniotic fluid gushing out was extremely uncomfortable because I have absolutely no control over it! I grabbed another towel to put on the seat in the car and we headed out.

Tc dropped me off so he could park and I wobbled into Mercy. The man at the lobby said "you look like you need to go up to the third floor" (birthing unit). And I said thank you and headed up.

We checked in, no biggie. No hurry. I'm just standing here leaking away. And finally got situated inside the birthing room. Adoree was super excited that her sister was finally coming. She walked around in circles. Pulled up a chair and sat next to me while I laid in my birthing bed. Our nurse Katie asked if we planned to have adoree there for when I deliver and I looked at Tc. I think he really planned on having her there haha. I wonder what it would've been like to have her as my birthing partner lol. But tc's mom had called in and took the day off so he took adoree home and came back before my contractions got intense.

Oh ya know, just Adoree making sure I'm ok while daddy plays his 2085 or whatever that number game is haha ^^. No worries, I wasn't in pain here yet. 

Katie asked how long my first labor was. I told her 12 hours of labor and 20 minutes of pushing. She said that hopefully with this being my second labor we can cut the amount of time in half. I'm like that would be awesome because contractions hurt like none other.

I handed Katie my birthing communication sheet.

No epidural, check

No episiotomy, check

birthing ball to get through contractions, check

Walk around as much as possible. (Didn't happen this time, the contractions hurt so much more it seemed, I was perfectly happy laying there squeezing Tcs hand as each contraction came)

Have skin to skin contact with baby and breastfeed baby as soon as possible, check

Have Tc cut umbilical cord, check!

It was about 6:30am when we were situated in the room. My contractions didn't get intense until about 10am. Katie said anytime I felt the need to push, I'll need to let her know. I was 4cm dilated when we first got there. At about 7 cm I was feeling intense contractions that were much more painful than I remembered. With every contraction more amniotic poured out. Can't believe there was that much fluid! 

Tc sat next to me while I squeezed his hand with every contraction. He thought it wouldn't be as painful since I've already gone through this...that is not the case. Shorter labor maybe, but not as painful? Nooooo. You wouldn't think that while your enduring this much pain, that simple supporting words like "you're doing real good" or "come on, you're almost there" could be so helpful and encouraging, but they are!! It pushes you through each contraction even though you know another one will be coming soon. 

At about 8cm-9cm I wanted to push but needed to wait til 10cm and for the doctor. I whispered to Tc I needed to push and Tc told Katie. She called for the doctor and I heard she was on her way. 

I laid there imagining the doc out grabbing coffee and driving back for my delivery. I'm sure she was in the building somewhere, but I noticed docs only come in when baby is ready to come out. The rest of the work was done by the nurse. 

Soon the doctor came in and I was pushing as hard as I could. Soooo much more painful than I remembered! 3 minutes later baby Eyslee came! 12:57pm, 20.25 inches long. 

Woohoo!!!! Tc caught everything on camera for me to watch later ^_^ Its pretty amazing that this 7 lb 14 ounce baby can come out of...there. :) Yes I've birthed Adoree before, but it's just as new the second time around to me. Each birth is different and special in it's own way. 

Baby Eyslee was placed quickly on my chest as Tc cut her umbilical cord. What chubby cheeks she had!!! They wiped her up and weighed her. Then brought her back for me to breastfeed. Eyslee latched on right away just like her big sister had. We are blessed. 

Our nurse Katie did an awesome job. This pic was taken by her not too long after Eyslee came out. You can tell she really cares about her job and enjoys doing it. She took really good care of us. She helped me get cleaned up and 

even got us a double bed for the room. Can't thank her enough! 

Later grandparents brought Adoree to come see our new addition! Adoree has been really hands on and can't keep her hands off of her new sister. She helps so much and will even ask me " what do you need mama? What you need for baby?" What a sweetie! Will she stay like this forever? 

As I continued to nurse Eyslee, I realized how much I had missed this baby stage!

Adoree has probably become more attached to daddy since i haven't been able to do as much for her. When we go to bed, she used to need me next to her, but with baby breastfeeding at bedtime, she has gotten used to daddy laying down next to her. 

Time is flying and before you know it, neither girls will need us next to them!! But right now I just need to enjoy these precious moments and not look too far ahead. 

Thank you to everyone who called and sent us happy messages!! Thank you to those that were able to visit Eyslee! We are so lucky to have so many family and friends welcoming baby Eyslee into this world!!