Little obsessions in my life: We are the children...

I spoke to a beautiful couple at a recent wedding and what they said to me just hit me on the head now. "When we have kids, we often become the children and learn from them." Maybe not those exact words. They worded it better.

Adoree is growing and becoming her own person. She definitely has her own way of doing things. Her thoughts are spoken loud and firm. She will tell you want she wants or doesn't want. And she has begun to talk back. One minute she is the sweetest little girl and the next she's flipping out about the smallest things and telling me "no". Or using my own words against me. She is such a good big sister, never acting jealous or mean to Eyslee. She's soo caring and gentle with her and such a big helper. But she definitely has started to voice her opinions, make excuses, and reasoning. I know that they eventually reach this stage but I didn't realize so soon.

From trying to teach her what's right and wrong, I've learned that maybe I'm the one that's been approaching her backlashes the wrong way. If anything it might be making her want to rebel even more?

Is it just her personality? Maybe I need to talk to her differently. Will she grow out of this stage? --- All these questions. I feel like I need a class on how to teach my child to be good. Or how to be a good mom?

Because...maybe I'M the bad one? She is so so smart, she remembers everything. Will she hold grudges? She still hugs me and says she loves me so she must not?

I've been googling and googling on children behaviors, toddler tantrums, how to discipline. How do I teach her the right ways and not change who she is.

No matter what, I just need to let her know I love her. Let her know that I'm trying to guide her.

For the first time these past couple months, I have realized how hard it is to be a mom. Sure...running around making sure she's fed, bathed, happy can take up a lot of time but it's the how to guide a child that's the hard part.

Everyday is a learning day...for all of us.

This made me remember the day when my own mom yelled at me because I kept making the same mistake cashing out some change from the cash register back when we ran a restaurant, and I was so sad and had tears streaming down my face, but what made me even more sad was that after my mom yelled at me, she went and sat and cried to herself.

Now I see myself in her shoes (big hugs for my mom!!!)...a few times when I've yelled at adoree for doing something naughty, I couldn't help the tears that formed in my eyes as she looks at me with sadness and tears running down her face. (Could be due to the raging hormones trying to balance itself after birthing Eyslee... ) Now I see my moms struggles as they begin to be mine.

Anyways, I keep reading that you have to pick your battles. And try to not fret the small ones.

One day she will understand I'm just trying to prepare her for the real world right? And she'll know that we discipline because we care?

*takes in a deep breath*

I'm sure this is nothing compared to what's to come when she becomes a teen @_@!

Just some thoughts for the day...everyday ^_^